Five Types Of Face-Me-I-Face Neighbours: Apo Edition
There is nothing comparable to living in a face-me-I-face-you house. For those who don’t know, it’s a daily dose of premium drama and gist. You hear the wildest stories and meet the craziest people, and there’s never a dull moment.
For our salmon-and-caviar-eating friends, a face-me-I-face-you or face-to-face is an apartment building with multiple rooms along a passage facing each other. You would commonly find a shared toilet, bathroom and kitchen space shared among the tenants.
If you want to know more, ask the people living in the famous Apo house or their neighbours. But for context, let’s explain:
- Oga Landlord:
He is the house owner with 21 single rooms, inherited or built. He has at least two wives, eight children and other extras no one knows about until he dies. His family is a constant source of drama with their rivalry, but the real family brouhaha begins when he dies.
That’s when pure drama starts. If you’re not careful, they will share you with the properties.
- Sisi Yemmie:
She is your gist plug. She is up to date with the latest news in the house and your go-to person to know the latest happenings. She knows everyone’s story and is just the right person to go to verify any gist you hear outside.
- Broda Yemi:
You know that ‘egbon adugbo’ that does nothing but drink all day and bring trouble? That’s Broda Yemi, all right. He is the landlord’s son and doesn’t have to worry about paying rent or food. He has all the time in the world to waste and his biggest problem is getting a fresh chilled bottle of beer.
- Bukola (Landlord’s Son’s Wife):
She is as complicated as her title, Landlord’s son’s wife. She is the de facto landlady, has a small shop outside the house and is involved in every fight. She brings nothing but drama and wahala, and you dare not challenge her authority if you love your peace of mind. Greet her when passing and mind your business when you hear her shouting.
- Iya Bolanle:
They are good mothers but always have that one child that is a menace. You will hear her voice almost every night, either shouting at the child or complaining about the child’s latest stint, exactly like Iya Bolanle and Bolanle. You’ll probably see her at every church event, praying for her child to change.
Want to live vicariously through the Apo tenants? Tune in every Monday and Tuesday on Africa Magic Yoruba (DStv Ch. 157 & GOtv ch. 2). Catch missed episodes every Saturday and Sunday at 6.30 p.m or watch on the go with DStv Stream. To get started, visit www.dstv.com/en-ng/watch/stream-with-dstv.
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